Reflecting

2014 was probably the best adult year I have ever had. I got my first salary job, I started casually dating for the first time, I made a budget that I could actually afford to stick to, I opened a savings account, I bought my acoustic guitar, I bought a new car, and I began building my wardrobe. These things probably seem incredibly ordinary, and hey, it’s because they are.

In 2014 although I was able to get the majority of my life on track, I dropped the ball in my personal life. I did some things that I thought went against my moral code. After apologizing for those things and addressing the reasons why I made certain decisions, I decided that I would try to make peace with all that transpired instead of holding it over my own head. This will probably be a lesson that will follow me into 2015 as I’m my own worst critic. That probably seems incredibly normal, and hey, it’s because it is.

In 2014 I found myself. This year has shown me who I really am. I think in my past I’ve had a tendency to use relationships and other things outside of myself to distract me from doing my inner work. To be so focused on something outside of me gave me a reason to ignore the flaws that I should have been addressing within myself and working on. 2014 was a year of minimal distractions. I spent a lot of the year pretty depressed because of this since I wasn’t accustomed to it. This was the first time I was forced to confront the things about myself that I would have rather swept up under a rug somewhere. Although it didn’t necessarily get easier, it also didn’t kill me. In 2014 I found out that I can survive alone…it has not been fun, but it can be done. That probably sounded like common sense, and hey, that’s because it is.

In 2014 I got back in touch with my spirituality and creativity. I painted, I sang consistently, wrote the music that was on my heart, picked up the novel I had stopped writing in 2013 and continued working on it. I also invested in a month of guitar lessons and vocal lessons. Oh, meditation. I also started meditating. I feel more in touch with myself then I have been in a while.

I’m thinking 2015 for me will be about learning to embrace things as they are. There is duality to everything. I will learn to embrace the things that I perceive to be negative and positive equally. I will work at not trying to resist the natural order things and events that occur. 2015 will be the year I learn to just ride the waves…

waves of celibacy…

waves of solitude…

waves of creativity…

waves of spirituality and awareness…

I’m pretty sure I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. Happy New Year.

7 thoughts on “Reflecting

  1. You’re so beautiful! I feel your best life is still waiting for you to grab it… don’t be afraid to take chances in relationships, or maybe traveling to another country. Because when you set yourself apart, you usually are alone. 2015 is your year to #BeCourageous!!

    • “When you set yourself apart, you are usually alone”, I will keep this in mind as I embark on this new year and continued journey. Thanks so much for always stopping by with so much positive energy…makes me feel not so alone after all. =] Happy Blogging!

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